i'm a shitty fren

dear you who is my dearest friends,

its not something that i've just realized (you guys whine so much its hard to be oblivious, ehehe) but i've always thought about it for so long.

i don't call or write a lot, by the time i get around to missing you guys a lot of time has passed. i was asleep and i didn't notice it, once i'm awake i'll come see you. wagamama des ne. selfish, selfish, selfish.

i am really lucky to have you guys as frens, nags a lot but i can take it :) and you're always there to drag me back to earth, always reaching out to me when i stray too far and kick my ass if i needed it (just ... not too hard okay?)

sometimes i get a little distant and quiet and i know that made you uncertain, i don't really know what to tell you, that kind of thing i also don't know why but if it seems to you that i'm not thinking about you when i don't talk to you or be with you more then even if i hate to be mushy mushy about it i wanted to say it clearly at least once ... (even if neuneu will complain!)

that i carry you with me wherever i go, and thats why i never thought of being far from you even when the distance separates us. so don't be sad anymore . sorry if i've made you feel neglected or it seemed that i don't care. even if everyday i can't be with you, i'll be there for you when you need me. so find me .....

i don't know how i turned out to be such a grouchy workaholic, i used to be such a bum. i might not be all showy with my affection but i miss you guys always and i really do enjoy our little meets. i'm emotionally crippled as you well know.

i always say i'll try harder and you're probably sick of hearing it but after all its still sincere. don't give up on me ...

your truly awkward friend,
**m**

what the ????

wined and dined last nite @ shenanigans + little italy respectively with hubbs and yo II and her mates.

emmm ... has the clubbin scene change so much since i've retired my dancing shoes? gawd! its so dead last nite and it was a friday nite no less. i bailed out at 11. and i thot i could paint the town red and give my shoes the workout. sori the dj + band sucks so bad. the drinks bad too! i mixed drinks better! i shud just stay home with my good fren chivas. WHAT THE???

anyhow, i just wanted to hangout with the girls for once, its kinda weird. ehehe. yo II is moving KL, so i thot to spend some time before she goes early may.

now, talking about moving .... sister quit her job and is also making the move, much earlier than yo II. heh, everybody is moving away. i won't be surprise anymore. so ray, take care of my sister or i'll be knockin on your door in sentul with my roach killer.

oh yeh, bro is finally accepted as a trainee at my org, after i drop my 'water face' and ask for a personal favor from GM! gawd, wat'll i'll do wen she calls on that favor! Dad also bugged Goldie about it so in the end they gave up and just gave bro the green flag.

i'm right in front of the tv and watching af. so i shud mention a lil bit about it.

boring.
alif, toi and faisal.

forever lame crybaby. wanabe cute.
saida. ok la tu ... (pukes)

the greats.
stacey, nadia, mama rina.

could be great. work on it dude!
stanley, ris.

the forgetables.
nubhan. ( doesn't he look like alim? bwahahaha)

ok fans, don't kill me, its only my own messed up thinking. u can think ur own way. just don't tell me. ehehehe.

thats all. wanna enjoy my 2nd plate of spaghetti! nite!

Don't Call My Name In Your Sleep ...

don't whisper to me your love
don't touch me with gentleness
don't look at me with eyes full of hope

i am full of hurtful thorns
i am only poison to you

why do you stick so close?
do you like it so much the path to eternal sorrow?

then so be it.
my name is ... sadness.

TOB

i can't get enuff of this place! (eee-yuck, i learned that from yahya!)



i talked so much about this place you gonna puke already if i say more.



its just that for this issue of nanyo elite we were spose to 'enjoy the glorious sunset at the tip of borneo' a.k.a 'land's end'. so here we are. but its not guaranteed at all since the weather is super unpredictable. the clouds didn't let us 'enjoy it' that day.



i think i've never said this before but the feelin (feeeeelin!) up there is a little bit eerie at this time of the day. words can't explain it so i won't try. why don't you guys try hanging out there on an evening when the full moon rises. its beautiful on the way back, you can catch playful peeks of the moon in the sky between the coconut tree's silhouettes .

: )

so finally i can start to post 'in the pursuit of heritage' road trip that we had some weeks ago. ehehe, sorry for the wait!!

its the beaches Kulanbu & kelampunian

i love the mountains and the beach equally but i'd rather live by the sea and have vacation on the mountain!!

so i'm totally a beach bum!

here's two of my favourites...i've raved on them before so i won't say much, just eye candy!



of these two beaches, i'm more into kulambu. sometime ago i heard that a really expansive time sharing villa was being built along the twin beaches of kulambu and i feared it'd be a private beach, but luckily they built it further along the stretch so we can still visit!



some years ago i caught a jellyfish here while snorkeling ... or rather it caught me. hence the souvenir on my back. oh well, one more won't matter!



theres a lot more traffic at Kelampunian, and usually during weekends theres lots of picnickers. wish i lived nearby, i'd be comin over everyday!

that's a dolphin's skeleton by the way. it washed to shore. i was told. ?



while kulambu is more exclusive, kulampunian is sorta like free - for - all and has a cluster of abodes alongside the road right up to the tip.



and since kulampunian leads to the tip of borneo, its not really a road less traveled anymore.



feel like cavorting in the sea? invite me will ya! Tip of borneo is next!

crossroads

lately i have the strangest feelin ...

i'm spacing out and thinking crazy stuff like joinin the circus. ahaha. (it wud b fun if dumbo was there!) anyhow i can't explain it, its a little bit troublesome. can't organize my work. my OCD is getting worse. so many little things to do. tch!

theres a little voice inside of me that seem to be screaming but strange that i can't make out the meanings. there are no words just sounds. i tried it out, just scream my guts out but i didn't feel any different after. oh well.

jon sang was offered a promotion. its in ipoh. i told him to go (i told him to go!!!) he's a little sad that i won't stop him. he's given his price, if he gets it then .... you kno. theres some stuff to think about. starting a new life somewhere sounds really great, but why the heck ipoh? since we're gonna be apart i might as well try and explore my possibilities elsewhere too. i'm thinkin about it. . . .

but it hurts me to detached from the hive. but since i'm the s&m type ... i guess it'll work out.

so. that's how it is. for now.